FMA Humor Drabbles
by Wingedbullets
Summary: FMA Drabbles created for just pure humor. Hope you get some good laughs out of these. None of these are to be taken seriously.
1. Chapter 1

**All of these Drabbles were made using a drabble online creator and filling out different slots. Most of the words I used I had no clue would end up like this. Quite interesting to say the least. So I decided to share with you what mine came up with. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own these characters but I wish I did. If I did they would have more scenes and sex would ensue just not in any of these crack-tastic ways. **

**Its meant to be humorous not serious obviously lol.**

**Flames will be ignored. **

**If you would like to see one please give me these: **

**Protagonist:**

Example: Frank (single name works best)

**Protagonist's gender:**

**Love interest:**

Example: Joe

**Love interest's gender:**

**Adjective 1:**

Example: iridescent

**Adjective 2:**

**Adjective 3:**

**Adjective 4:**

**Adjective 5:**

**Adjective 6:**

**Adjective 7:**

**Adjective 8:**

**Adjective 9:**

**Adverb 1:**

Ex: huskily

**Adverb 2:**

**Adverb 3:**

**Adverb 4:**

**Adverb 5:**

**Noun 1:**

Ex: egg

**Noun 2:**

**Noun 3:**

**Body part 1 (singular):**

Ex: arm

**Body part 2 (singular):**

**Body part 3 (singular):**

**Transitive Verb - infinitive:**

Ex: kick

**Same Verb - past tense third:**

Ex: kicked

**Animal:**

Ex: fish

**Prepositional phrase:**

Ex: on a rock

**Extended metaphor:**

Ex: like a rainbow that casts a happy glow o'er all the land

**fill out this form and post it in your review and ill put it through the drabble machine and see what happens then post it for your viewing pleasure. **


	2. A Skintight Day to Caress

**This was created using a drabble online creator and filling out different slots. Most of the words I used I had no clue would end up like this. Quite interesting to say the least.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own these characters but I wish I did. If I did they would have more scenes and sex would ensue.**

**Its meant to be humorous not serious obviously lol. **

**XXxxXX**

**Couple: Jean/Kain**

**XXxxXX**

**A Skintight Day To Caress**

Jean stepped playfully out into the childlike sunshine, and admired Kain's cock. "Ah," he sighed, "That's a smokey sight."

Kain climbed off the egg and walked obediently across the grass to greet his lover. Jean patted Kain on the lips and then tried to caress him sexily, but without success.

"That's all right," Kain said. "We can try again later."

"I'm just not bright," Jean. "Not as bright as the time we licked on the stove top."

Kain nodded gently. "We were thoughtful back in those days."

"Our asss were younger, and we had a lot more fun with them," Jean said. "Everything seems caring and Beautiful when you're young."

"Of course," Kain said. "But now we're submissive, we can still have fun. If we go about it firmly."

"Firmly?" Jean said . "But how?"

"With this," Kain said and held out a gorgeous boxers. "Just take that with some water and in half an hour, you'll be ready to caress."

Jean swallowed the boxers at once and sure enough, in half an hour, they were able to caress firmly. They licked like a cat thats caught a mouse.. Three times.

And then the neighbour told them to get off his lawn.


	3. An Egg In Time

**This was created using a drabble online creator and filling out different slots. Most of the words I used I had no clue would end up like this. Quite interesting to say the least.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own these characters but I wish I did. If I did they would have more scenes and sex would ensue.**

**Its meant to be humorous not serious obviously lol. **

**XXxxXX**

**Couple: Edward/Alphonse**

**XXxxXX**

**An Egg In Time**

On a gorgeous and bright morning, Ed sat on the stove top. It was Valentine's Day and he was all alone. His lips ached in sorrow for the secret love that he could never share. How could he expect Al to love someone with a Beautiful cock?

Playfully, he began to recite a poem he had composed. "Ah, my love is like a sucklinly thoughtful boxers, all on a summer's day. I wish my Al would caress me, in his own submissive way..."

"Do you?" Al sat down beside Ed and put his hand on Ed's ass. "I think that could be arranged."

Ed gasped gently. "But what about my Beautiful cock?"

"I like it," Al said firmly. "I think it's skintight."

They came together and their kiss was like a cat thats caught a mouse..

"I love you," Ed said obediently.

"I love you too," Al replied and licked him.

They bought a kitten, moved in together, and lived sexily ever after.


	4. Firmly Tripping

**This was created using a drabble online creator and filling out different slots. Most of the words I used I had no clue would end up like this. Quite interesting to say the least.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own these characters but I wish I did. If I did they would have more scenes and sex would ensue.**

**Its meant to be humorous not serious obviously lol. **

**XXxxXX**

**Couple: Jean/Kain**

**XXxxXX**

**Firmly Tripping**

Jean tripped along sexily. He was on his way to meet his lover, Kain, for Valentine's Day. He smiled to see a penguin hopping along, carrying an egg in its mouth.

Jean was almost in the pool when he came across a submissive cake, lying alone on a Beautiful plate. "That must be a treat from my caring bear," he said to himself, and tripped over to it. The cake looked smokey, so he ate it.

It gave him the most bright tingling sensation in his ass. "How unusual!" he said and continued tripping to see Kain.

When Kain came out to meet him, he took one look and fell over.

"What is it?" Jean cried gently.

"Your lips! And your cock!" Kain said. "They're childlike! Can't you feel it?"

Jean felt his lips and his cock. They were indeed quite childlike. "Oh, no!" Jean said. "I'm a woman!" He, or rather, she started to cry. "It must have been that submissive cake you left for me. Did you know what it would do?"

"I didn't leave you any cake," Kain said. "I got you a boxers. It must have been that skintight man who lives nearby. He acts a little obediently, ever since he licked an aftermath."

"But how can you ever love me, now that I'm a woman?" Jean sobbed.

"Well, I never knew how to tell you this," Kain said playfully, "but I actually prefer women. And I think your lips is really abandoned like that."

"Really?" Jean dried her tears. Jean kissed Kain and it was an entirely thoughtful sensation, like a cat thats caught a mouse..

They spent the night having entirely thoughtful sex, until the cake wore off suddenly.

Everything was rather awkward after that.


	5. I Saw Kain Kissing Santa Claus

**This was created using a drabble online creator and filling out different slots. Most of the words I used I had no clue would end up like this. Quite interesting to say the least.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own these characters but I wish I did. If I did they would have more scenes and sex would ensue.**

**Its meant to be humorous not serious obviously lol. **

**XXxxXX**

**Couple: Jean/Kain**

**XXxxXX**

**I Saw Kain Kissing Santa Claus**

Jean woke up in the middle of the night. He was thirsty and so he decided to get a drink of water and maybe go peek at the presents under the tree. Even though it was almost Christmas morning, he couldn't wait to see his presents. There was one Beautiful box that looked like a boxers.

Then Jean noticed that Kain was out of bed too. He must not have been able to wait for his presents either.

Jean thought that he would surprise Kain. Maybe even sneak up behind him and caress him on his gorgeous ass. That always made Kain skintight.

Jean crept gently down the stairs and into the living room. There was the tree, with its bright lights, and the presents, heaped up playfully, and the mistletoe hanging from the ceiling, and Kain. Kissing someone.

Jean was so angry, he picked up a egg from a table and threw it obediently on the stove top.

They both looked around.

"Kain, you childlike puppy!" Jean yelled. "How could you cheat on me with...with..." Jean looked and then rubbed his cock and looked again. It was Santa Claus.

"Let me explain," Kain said. "I came down for a glass of water and then I found Santa here under the mistletoe."

"Ho! Ho! Ho!" Santa said. "So of course he had to give me a kiss. And what a thoughtful kiss it was."

"Well, I suppose," Jean said firmly. "If he was under the mistletoe."

"Ho! Ho! Ho!" Santa said. "Why don't you give me a kiss too? Then things will be smokey."

That seemed reasonable. Jean went over under the mistletoe and kissed Santa.

Santa was the best kisser ever, like a cat thats caught a mouse.. He made Jean's lips feel all caring.

"You see?" Kain said sexily and Jean saw. So they had a threeway.

Everybody's presents were late.


	6. Maes and Roy Remake of Shakespear

**This was created using a drabble online creator and filling out different slots. Most of the words I used I had no clue would end up like this. Quite interesting to say the least.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own these characters but I wish I did. If I did they would have more scenes and sex would ensue.**

**Its meant to be humorous not serious obviously lol. **

**XXxxXX**

**Couple: Roy/Maes**

**XXxxXX**

**Maes and Roy**

by William Shakespeare ( my rendition of it)

Enter Maes

Roy appears above at a window

**Maes:**

But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks?

It is the egg, and Roy is the puppy.

Arise, gorgeous puppy, and caress the childlike aftermath.

See, how he leans his ass upon his lips!

O, that I were a glove upon that lips,

That I might touch that ass!

**Roy:**

O Maes, Maes! wherefore art thou Maes?

What's in a name? That which we call a cock

By any other name would smell as submissive

Dost thou love me? I know thou wilt say "like a cat thats caught a mouse."

And I will take thy word; yet if thou swear'st,

Thou mayst prove bright.

**Maes:**

Swain, by yonder childlike aftermath I swear

That tips on the stove top the thoughtful boxers-

**Roy:**

O, swear not by the aftermath, the Beautiful aftermath,

That gently changes in its caring orb,

Lest that thy love prove likewise caring.

Sweet, smokey night! A thousand times smokey night!

Parting is such skintight sorrow,

That I shall say smokey night till it be morrow.

Exit above

**Maes:**

Sleep dwell upon thine ass, peace in thy lips!

Would I were sleep and peace, so firmly to rest!

sexily will I to my gorgeous cock's cell,

Its help to caress, and my submissive cock to tell.


	7. The Cat Prince

**This was created using a drabble online creator and filling out different slots. Most of the words I used I had no clue would end up like this. Quite interesting to say the least.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own these characters but I wish I did. If I did they would have more scenes and sex would ensue.**

**Its meant to be humorous not serious obviously lol. **

**XXxxXX**

**Couple: Frank/Zolf**

**XXxxXX**

**The Cat Prince **

Frank was walking through a dark meadow, laughing at the butterflies flitting around his head when he spied a crazy little cat lying under a tree.

Frank skipped over to see the dear thing and was abandoned to find that he was hurt! An apparel had pierced his caring little cock and he whimpered playfully with the pain.

"My elegant little friend," Frank said. "Let me help you!" He took out his Leatherman Multi-Purpose tool and pulled out the apparel, as kindly as he could. The cat cried out and Frank's heart ached, like a cat thats caught a mouse.. "You'll be all right," Frank whispered. "I'll take care of you. I'll call you Zolf and you can live with me forever!"

Scooping Zolf up in his arms, Frank carried him home and made a bed for him beside his own. For seven days and seven nights, Frank nursed Zolf, cleaning his cock and feeding him Aftermath-brand cat chow.

On the eighth night, Zolf climbed into bed with Frank. He burrowed under the covers and huskily licked Frank's ass. It made Frank giggle and he cuddled close to Zolf, stroking his leg and singing tightly to him.

They continued that way for a long time. Every day, Frank hurried home so he could curl up with Zolf. It gave him a childlike feeling whenever Zolf licked his ass.

Then one night, Zolf looked up at Frank and said, "If you kiss me, I will become a domineering prince."

Frank screamed obediently, he was so surprised. How could a cat talk? He must have dropped off and dreamed it.

"You're not dreaming," Zolf said. "Kiss me."

"Don't tell anyone I screamed like that," Frank said and kissed Zolf on his leg. The air swirled and suddenly, there stood a domineering prince! With a crown and everything!

"I'm Prince Zolf," he said. "I was cursed. It's a long story."

"Is it really you?" Frank said.

"See?" Zolf said and showed Frank the scar from the apparel on his cock. Then he kissed Frank and they tumbled on the table and did a lot of very crabby things, some of them involving an electric jeans.

"I love you," Zolf said when they were done. Frank clasped him close and they lived together happily ever after on all the prince treasure Zolf had stashed away.

And if Zolf didn't know about Frank's visits to the cat sanctuary, well, it wouldn't hurt him.


End file.
